One of the most powerful exchanges I've ever had with my mom, was recounting her experience of escaping Laos: It was during Lao New Year in 1980, for some reason, Laos and Thailand had a shared celebration that year, which allowed people to move freely between the two countries. She went to the last day of the celebration with her mother. As she was about to leave, she saw a friend who seemed to be in rush, and asked her where she was going – her friend was going to cross the border to Thailand to go to the refugee camp there. My mom decided that she wanted to go too. She wanted to see her brother and one of her sisters who had already swum over (she didn’t initially go with them because she didn’t know how to swim). An uncle/family friend was taking people over the border that day. He told my mom that if she wanted to go, she would have to go then and there (the border would be closed and it would then be dangerous to try to cross over). So, she went over to my grandmother and explained her plans. My grandmother couldn’t say anything, but just had tears running down her face – my mom couldn’t bear to see her cry so she rushed off. As my mom is telling me this, we both choke up and cry. When my grandmother went home, she lied to my great grandmother, who my mom was very close with, that my mom had gone to stay with a friend that night. This part of the story especially breaks my heart. I can’t imagine having to make a split second decision that changes the course of my life forever.